A good example…


Now we will look at two responses to the questions from the previous exercise. Let’s start with the good response.

Question:

You have just returned from a weekend break at a hotel called the Campbell Hotel. When you arrived home you found that you had left a personal item at the hotel.

Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter:

  • Give details of your stay
  • Describe what you have left there
  • Ask the hotel manager to arrange for the item to be returned to you

Response:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to you regarding a personal belonging of mine which I seem to have left at your hotel during my recent stay.

My husband and I were staying in room 306 from the 3rd to the 5th of August and I have now realised that I accidentally left a gold necklace in the hotel room security safe. Although it is not a particularly expensive piece of jewellery it has sentimental value and I would be extremely grateful if you would be able to arrange its safe return.

I wonder if it would be possible for you or one of your members of staff to arrange for the necklace to be posted to my home address. I would be happy to pay for any costs involved should that be necessary.

I would be grateful if you could acknowledge receipt of this letter and confirm whether you are able to assist me.

I apologise for any inconvenience caused and I thank you for your help with this matter.

Yours faithfully


Gill Johnson


Comments:

This is a good response as it covers all aspects of the question:

  • Give details of your stay – room 306 from the 3rd to the 5th of August
  • Describe what you have left there – I accidentally left a gold necklace in the hotel room security safe.
  • Ask the hotel manager to arrange for the item to be returned to you – I wonder if it would be possible for you or one of your members of staff to arrange for the necklace to be posted to my home address

The register used is appropriate:

  • I am writing to you regarding
  • I wonder if it would be possible
  • should that be necessary.
  • if you could acknowledge receipt of this letter
  • confirm whether you are able to assist me.
  • I apologise for any inconvenience caused
  • Yours faithfully

An appropriate range of grammar has been used:

  • which I seem to have left (relative clause)
  • I would be extremely grateful if (conditional statement)
  • should that be necessary (modal verbs)
  • any inconvenience caused (passive voice)

 

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